Trump Can’t Touch Me.

People are rushing to get married, names changed, transitions finalized. With Barrett on the Supreme Court bench now…regardless if Biden wins, or Trump gets re-elected, LGBTQ+ rights are at risk.

We are up against an oncoming storm. People should not be denied basic rights—marriage, access to healthcare, job security, housing, etc.—simply because a small religious minority disagrees with our existence.

I started my journey in 2014, and finished up in 2017. I legally changed my name twice, the latter change just months ago.

I knew with Trump potentially winning it would be a good idea to get my changes wrapped up ASAP so in case anything against our community was passed, I’d be protected. Why? The Constitution here and here state that laws (whether at state or federal level) can’t undo previously done actions, in my case meaning Trump’s army can’t force me to detransition, can’t force me to live as a woman again, can’t punish me for having already transitioned. They could prohibit pre-op and future generations of transgender youth from transitioning, but people like me, people who’ve had everything done, we (theoretically—but we know how theory don’t always work in reality!) have little to nothing to worry about. Given their hypocrisy over replacing Ginsberg rather than wait till the next President elect takes office, I wouldn’t doubt they’d come after post-ops like me.

I know I’m saying this from a place of “privilege”—I’m white, male-identifying and male-passing, straight (attracted to women for readers who are confused about sexual orientation regarding the trans community), from a Christian background (albeit now an atheist), from a Republican-voting family in a small-town and conservative area (though I vote Democrat), have a supportive family and workplace, and live in a state that protects against discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity/expression, and was lucky to enough to legally change my name and gender identification and have all my legal documents reflect that.

I get it, too—I’ve had otherwise potentially transphobic people befriend me or open up their minds because I’m “binary”, because I had “the surgery”, because I pass, because I took a very old-school, thorough approach to getting everything done, because I don’t ask for ”exemptions like a snowflake”. Because I choose to not let the micro-aggressions of deadnaming, misgendering, questions about “the surgery” get in the way of having open, honest conversations with people; there are times where it’s important to correct others, but in these kinds of conservations, my aim to build alliances, not win a debate, and I (try to) let this stuff slide.

I know with my “privileges”, that if and when I find a girlfriend and we decide to marry, we can easily go anywhere and get married, and because we’d be “straight-acting” and cis-passing, we wouldn’t have to worry about people refusing us service if they’re against queer marriage.

I do not want to regress to a state where my rights are determined on a state-by-state basis, or even at a county-by-county/town-by-town level. I do not want my taxes, Social Security, and other welfare situations, be complicated for my partner and I, where we claim each other on some things, but not others. I do not want my trans siblings to have to constantly worry about where it’s okay to use the loo when out-and-about. I do not want my trans siblings in same-gender-loving relationships (or with SGL leanings in general) to have to choose between marrying first before transitioning, or transitioning but then allow for misgendering while going through getting legally married. (The wedding can always be put off and everyone can be themselves at that point.) I don’t want anyone to feel like if they had to go to hospital for an emergency that they’d be turned away because a doctor thinks his religious convictions are more important than our right to healthcare. I do not want my queer siblings to feel like they have to choose between constantly fighting for their rights where they live, or choosing to pack up an leave for a queer-friendly state where their rights are at least guaranteed at the state level.

My irony—I survived during the Bush years, but suffered when Obama initially ran, although during his second term I recovered and was able to begin my transition. Under Trump, I will be able to survive again. This counters my community who suffered under Bush, thrived under Obama, and yet suffers again under Trump. And as we look onto the oncoming storm, while I can take refuge here in these mountains, there will be many who can’t, especially if Trump’s re-elected.

Fear can mean two things, you choose how to respond: forget everything and run, or face everything and rise.

There will be days you’ll want to give up. Days you want to retreat. Days that you’d want it to all be over. Take time off from everything from time to time if the stress burns you out. If fighting becomes too much, really it might just be better to pack up and move to an area where your rights will still be protected at the state level.

4 comments

  1. You are right about Barrett. I wish I had the money and time to at the bare minimum get my surgery. But… I still have to wait. My saving grace is I live in a state that is very LGBTQ friendly, so I don’t have to worry too much. It was without a doubt a cheap and dirty move on the GOP to rush her confirmation.

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    1. I am very angry at the hypocrisy of the Republicans over this. Yes, to be human means involving hypocrisy, but this is at the expense of the people, they only did this because they’re afraid desperately of losing out to Biden, and using the Supreme Court not to represent the rule of law anymore, but to push their hate-filled, adharmic, mindless agenda upon the rest of the people. People like her believe this country should be some Judeo-Christian state, not a secular democracy. Yes, some colonies like Pennsylvania and Massachusetts were founded as havens for “unorthodox” (non-Anglican) believers to leave and worship in peace, but others like the Carolinas and Jersey were founded merely for trade, rewards to rich people who did favors for the King.

      Tangent aside… we will get through this. Our people have always survived one way or another. If the worst happens, we will only come out of this stronger.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. You and me both. I actually stopped following the Barrett confirmation because I knew it wouldn’t matter The republicans have done nothing but shown their true colors these past four years. They are willing to put party before people. I knew she was going to be confirmed whether we liked it or not. I can only hope that she does hold true to the law and put her beliefs aside for the good of all people (keyword: hope) I know. It’s farfetched, but even Kavanaugh surprised me a few times with his vote. Only time will tell and show us Barrett’s true colors.

      Agree: we have been through much worse. The 80s is proof enough of our resilience and ability to overcome adversity.

      Liked by 1 person

    3. I’m really trying to figure out what happened. In the 50s and 60s, the Republicans were for integration and the Pill, the Dixiecrats wanted segregation. Now it’s a total switch. 😂

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